Lesbian Thursday

A real conversation I had with my beffie. (I don't remember how we came up with "beffie", so just roll with it.)

Her: I need to sell my shit to help pay for daycare.

Me: Lolz right? Effing daycare.

Her: In 2018, when the kids are in elementary school I'm going to be able to wipe my ass with $5 bills. I would use 20's but that would just be wasteful.

Me: Yeah, and what if you poo twice that day? $40 is way too much to spend on turds.

Her: You're a realist too. That's why we're beffs.

Me: Also, I love you.

Her: I feel the same way. If I were a lezzie I'd totally tap that.

Me: Only on Thursdays.

Her: Ok deal.

And that's how Lesbian Thursdays became a thing. 

And now it's time to go change all of my facebook friends' political opinions with long-winded ranting status updates! I kid, I kid. But seriously, can we please not do that anymore?