Frisky Friday: If you want to get into her pants...

Here are some failproof things to tell her:

Nope, not weird at all.
It's especially not weird that you opened with that.

By "not weird", I of course mean weird. Weird that he's still single, that is.

You could go a more subtle route:
Notice his super clever username.

I bet that guy totally has a six pack in real life. Totally. I bet he absolutely doesn't live in a creepy apartment in the sketchy part of town. Total panty-dropper.

Or you could keep it vague and mysterious:

A man of few words.

Talking is totally overrated. Sense of humor, schmense of humor. I'd much rather "cummulti" than actually get to know someone.

Comments

  1. Are you on dating sites? I have been on and off of match.com for 2 years now and have had ZERO luck. I get emails from old guys and rednecks and that's about it. I'm sorry but if you have a picture of you holding up a fish you just caught or a you're with a dead turkey, please skip past my profile.

    Dating sucks dirty donkey balls.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey, I resent that! I'm a totally nice guy and if I were to sign up for a dating site, a fish would probably be involved in my profile picture.

      Don't paint with such a broad fishing rod. Or however the saying goes.

      Delete
    2. See, that's the hard thing about dating websites. It's typically based on initial from pictures which sucks but it is what it is. And, I'm not saying that these guys holding up fish aren't nice guys. I'm sure you're awesome but most of the guys, in my area, who are holding said fish, typically aren't the type of guy I'm looking for. I know for a fact there are guys, who fish, that I would totally date. I've just ruled out interacting with those guys on the dating websites.

      To each their own. :)

      Delete
    3. And, that sounded like a rambly mess. LOL I will say that I don't necessarily rule anyone out. I just have my preferences...they're not hard and fast rules though. ;)

      Delete
  2. i had tons of luck on dating sites...it just takes awhile to weed through the stinkers. pic #1 - nerd...perfect for you megh! #2 - old fat guy in a basement. mostdeff. #3 - simple man with no game.(aka...most men)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Picture #2 is totally the french model on the State Farm commercial. Hahaha!

    ReplyDelete
  4. My favorite was when the random dudes from India would hit me up, then wonder why I told them it wasn't going to happen. Sorry, I'm not getting you your visa. No way. Also, soooooooooooo hard to find good guys who don't have baggage you are unprepared to handle. I hope you have much better luck than I ever did.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I just got into the online dating thing a month ago...

    my favorite line so far is "If I could order you on a menu, I ask for McGorgeous" ....whatever happened to hey how's it going...no lines no bull lol..

    GodSpeed on your endeavors.

    ReplyDelete

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