And that's why you always leave a note

Holy Arrested Development Holiday Weekend, Batman. For a weekend that I went into with exactly zero plans, it shaped up to be awesome. I love it when that happens.

For me, the party is still going. If by "party" you understand that I mean going to the pool by myself so I don't have to talk to people. Hey, if you're an introvert you are welcome to join me go somewhere else, I don't want to talk to you. (Just kidding.) (But seriously.)

My stomach saw sunlight this weekend for the first time in years, y'all. YEARS. 

At first, I was hesitant to post that picture. Then I thought about how far I've come and how much hard work I've put in (and how much I still have to do) and I said fuck it - I worked hard and here is the proof. YOU can do it, too. Errrbody starts somewhere.

Hey, have you heard of Cowboys stadium? Yeah, me neither. 

I kid. My friend invited me to the muhfuckin' OWNER'S CLUB there. It doesn't matter what the event is, you always accept Owner's Club tickets. It was Taylor Swift and we spent most of the concert in the OC (see what I did there?) eating the free noms and dranking the free dranks. Nothing against TSwizzle, but I'm just not down for deafening tween-screaming for 2 goddamn hours.

Plus, she gave off a douchey vibe.

I lost count of my vodka cranberries when it got into the double digits. Yeah, I know it's a bitch drink. WHAT. It's good that my friend was driving. Safety first, I say.

I may be wee, but I'm pretty sure I can drink you under the table. It's a superpower, really. We had to stop on the way home to pee at a skeevy gas station - I'm fuzzy on the deets, but I'm pretty sure there was a drug deal happening. Also we almost hit a bobcat that ran across the highway. Thanks, Texas.

Oh good. 

Well, that's why I run. To drink. Because I am the embodiment of class.

Tomorrow I have a pretty solid giveaway planned. I hope you have a great rest-of-your-holiday-weekend!


  1. I also work out so I can drink. No shame here.

  2. Yeah! What are you reading!? Hell yes to the OC!

  3. I know for a fact that you could drink me under the table any day of the year.

    You are rockin' the bikinis!

  4. We share the same drinkin' superpower. Love it.

  5. You are looking damn fine in that bikini, woman! And yeah, I would have totally been skipping the concert with you for the free drinks and food. Pretty sure you could drink me under the table, though. I just don't have the tolerance I used to.


Post a Comment