Frisky Friday: First date rules for my guys

I'm a girl who is into guys. Nice guys who have manners, more specifically. None of that emo angsty shit. No douchebags. No bad boys. This may come as a shock to you, but I'm really fucking nice and polite in person, and I want to be around people who are equally fucking nice and polite. Here are things I like to see on a first date:

- Don't be creepy. Offer to meet at wherever we're going. I don't want you to know where I live, what if you're a serial killer? P.S. If you're not creepy, I won't be creepy either. No holds barred if you're a creep, though.


- Don't make me wait for you. Be on time or early. Fashionably late only works for girls and Kanye West.


- Hold the door open for me. Women may be allowed to vote now, but we still don't get paid as much as you. You are clearly the superior being, and with that comes the responsibility of being chivalrous. Woo me.


- Keep the conversation going with non-oogie questions. I'm not telling you anything about my sex life. I'll totally tell you my favorite movie or why I have a scar on my knee, though.


- You pay. I'll reach for the check or offer, but you should definitely pay. I'll say "I don't mind" or "No, it's not fair for you to pay" or something to that effect, but it's a test. You pay and you've passed.


- Be yourself - you only get one shot. Bring your best jokes. Am I laughing at them? Am I engaged in the conversation? If I'm not, then just call a spade a spade and gtfo. They all can't be winners. But if I am, then I'm into you. Have I touched you at all? That's a sign, too.


- To kiss or not to kiss? I go back and forth on this one. It depends on how long you've known each other, how you met, etc. Definitely hug, and go with your gut on keeses.


- No sex (in the champagne room). Don't be slutty, man. Go home and have sex with yourself. Also not allowed on a first date? Rufies.


- Text me the next day if you're interested. The three day rule is outdated. Send a text saying you had fun and confirm our next date.

Comments

  1. Yes, to all of this except the kiss thing. I've more than likely just met you or we're just getting to know each other on a more personal level so keep your tongue in your own damn mouth.

    Not that I know anything. I almost never have dates and when I do and I think they're going well, I'm horribly wrong. When I think the dates suck, the guys apparently don't feel that way and I have a hard time getting rid of them.

    Blah, I hate dating with a passion.

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    1. You talking to me?! LOL is that what the ^ means?

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  3. " Definitely hug, and go with your gut on keeses." I read as definitely hug and go with your gut on your knees. I was like "omg scandalous" lol...on that related note dating BLOWS.

    I had an okc first date two weeks ago and he talked about his most recent ex being his first love and how he thought they'd be together forever. ....Talking about ex's on the first date..Definite NO

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  4. Molly AnnnnnnnnnnJune 14, 2013 at 12:20 PM

    ohhh, excellent point above about not talking about exes! you can pick that hint up in a recent T.Swift song ("for the firsttttt time, the past stays the passssst"), and obviously that girl has had plennnnnnty of successful first dates, so she would know.
    I think a guy's on dangerous ground asking anything about something that could potentially be perceived (by neurotic females) as noticing something is 'wrong' about them, like a scar. We prefer to be glowy-aura-surrounded pristine beings, no? And I think a lot of women will interpret an offer to meet at the place as some kind of down-graded date, though I doooooooooo see your point about not wanting him to know where you live! just some thoughts :)

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  5. Texting the day after is one of the first things that drew me to my husnand... I was happy he wasn't playing games... Plus, he's dorky text made me realize he wasn't a "player" which I loved... Duh!

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  6. Ammon didn't even give me a hug at the end of our first date. He waved. I was convinced I'd blown it completely.

    I totally called that one wrong.

    Love the memes! And agree with 99% of this =)

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