Why? Because I'm an asshole sometimes. I forget that I was once a resolutioner. I forget that there was a time when I wouldn't go near the squat rack, and big-fat-FUCK trying to do a pull up in front of people.
That was years ago. Now I walk into the gym with my big girl panties on (or sometimes no panties, heyooo) and hit the weights because I want to have a nice ass when I prance around in my bikini this summer. (Or maybe it's because I ate my weight in chips and queso last night.) WHATEVER, the point is that I'm sorry for briefly being an asshole in my head. I like that you're in the gym - maybe we can be workout buddies one day. I'll see you in bodypump, betch.
A year after I took the picture on the left, which I was too ashamed to even get my whole body in, I took the one on the right. There's a 48 pound difference, hooks. (And a spray tan, obv.)
Tips for Resolutioners (Just the tip):
- Set attainable goals. It's easy to get burnt out if you expect to lose 50 lbs overnight. It's just not gonna happen. Try working out 10% harder than you did the last time you were at the gym, whether that be increasing the weight, reps, distance, etc. Couch to 5k is awesomesauce if you want to get into running.
- Realize that weight loss happens in the kitchen, not the gym. If you're still eating fried chicken for every meal, you're gonna have a bad time.
- Try the classes. There are always people of all fitness levels in them. Maybe you'll meet a friend! Accountability is key. I always have a better workout where I push myself harder when I workout with a buddy.
- Reward yourself, but not with food. Set up a plan for rewards when you hit milestones. Once you hit 5 pounds lost, get yourself a new gym shirt. Or maybe when you run your first mile without stopping, get yourself a cool new water bottle. DO NOT reward yourself with cheesecake. It's counterproductive.
To get a personal trainer or not to get a personal trainer?
Back when I had no idea what I was doing, I paid for a trainer. I went through three of them and I found them all to be grossly condescending. After all, I'm a human being
I still learned from each of them, but I found that the cost outweighed the benefit. I learned more from doing my own research, and I was never made to feel like a fuckup. I read blogs written by people similar to me and tried what they were doing. (I still do that.) It's a constant process and I'm a work in progress. So all that said, I think personal trainers are worth a shot, but don't put all of your faith in their magic touch. In the end, your health is your responsibility, not theirs.
But what gear do you need?
Back when I started at the gym, I had old t-shirts and yoga pants because they were comfortable on my jiggly ass. I didn't have fancy running shoes. I didn't have a spibelt or energy gu or a foam roller or a fitbit or weight lifting gloves or one of those watches that measures your calorie burn. (Still don't, except the spibelt and good shoes.) You don't need any of that. Sure, it can be helpful, but it's a luxury. How about instead of running out and spending a fortune now, you reward yourself with a cute new tank top with a sassy phrase on it in March if you've stuck with your plan? Or if you're a dude, a manly new shirt with some sports team on it.
Skinny bitches at the gym.
Listen. I get it. I think I fall in this category now, but it wasn't always this way. I always felt like the skinny bitches that weren't even sweating on the elliptical were judging the everliving shit out of my fat ass when I was huffing along on the bike in my XL tshirt soaked in blood, sweat and tears. Or when I had to stop after 3 sit-ups. Or when I used level 4 on the treadmill and thought I was running, and even then couldn't keep it up for longer than a minute. The reality? Nobody in the gym gives a shit about what you're doing. Nobody is counting your reps. Nobody will notice what level you're on on the treadmill. Everyone is so into themselves that they barely notice you, unless you're on the machine they want, and even then they don't notice you, they just notice that the machine is in use. Boom.
The point is, you're on the right track.