The weekend is when the magic happens

Hey guuuuuuuuuuuuurl. Did sports happen yesterday, because I feel like sports happened yesterday. Remember the good ol' days when you could just enjoy chips and queso without putting a picture of your gluten free low carb queso bites on the internet, filling viewers me with shame as I shovel full-fat full-carb full-gluten chips and queso into my face repeatedly? I remember those days. They were nice.

I didn't have a great healthy eating weekend. We were celebrating almost the entire time, so at least there's that. Still, I haven't been on my game much at all lately. I'm getting real sick 'n tired of not putting 100% into my workouts, but on February 7th I can start running again and I'm hoping that will kick me into gear. Surgery is a bitch, y'all. That's why I don't go to the doctor. Every time I go they tell me I need surgery and then I'm benched for 6 months. Uh, no thanks. 

I took Friday off work for an #epicdayofawesome with my kid, but really it was just me bringing him along to run all the errands I didn't have time to do during the week because as a single parent I have to do all the things. There's no "okay honey, you get the car inspected and I'll take the dog to the vet" or the unspoken "I'll do the dishes and you take out the trash". Nope. All me, all the time. So we went to the vet first thing in the morning where my dog promptly fell off the exam table 100% of his own accord and then started growling at everyone in the room as if to say "WHICH ONE OF Y'ALL FUCKERS PUSHED ME OFF THIS FUCKING TABLE YOU FUCKING FUCKS". He's old and senile so we let it slide. Plus, look how adorbs.

He just gets cuter when he's angry.

We were running around literally all day. Car re-inspection after failing initial inspection and replacing tires/brakes/etc, groceries, hair appointment, buying things and so on. So much b.s. that I didn't have time to get to the gym. I hate that. But y'all know my kid was such a trooper the whole day, so I didn't feel too terrible spending $25 on a souvenir laser gun toy at Marvel Universe Live that night. 

Okay. If you're planning on going to this show (Dallas is over, but it's a touring thing), know that it's AWESOME for kids and lame AF for adults, so if you're an adult comic book nerd without children, this is not a wise investment. The actors' costumes were those puffy muscle suits you can get at party stores, y'all, and they overacted and underacted all the scenes at the same time. It was legit LAME. The kids loved it though, and that's what counts, right? Right. 

I passed out the moment I sat down when we got home that night, which meant that I had to finish making cake(s) on Saturday morning before we drove to BFE, TX for a birthday party. This was an all day affair complete with not only cake, but twinkies, energy drinks, fast food and Mexican food. I'm a-scared to weigh myself, y'all. Legit afraid.

The giant minion is cake covered in homemade marshmallow fondant. Delish, but a bitch and a half to work with.
The lil dudes are twinkies dipped in melted chocolate. 

Side note: I just uploaded the wrong picture three times in a row for that cake. Why is it the wrong picture? Because I misspelled my own blog name in the watermark. I'm le tired.

Minion Twinkie How To: Freeze twinkies for an hour. Dip in blue, shove stick in. ("Shove" was maybe not the best word choice. Ouch.) Freeze again. Dip in yellow, let dry. Embellish. I used leftover icing from the big cake to add overall straps/pockets and goggles, and I totally cheated with the eyes and used eyeball shaped sprinkle things.

The big cake was my first experience with covering a cake in marshmallow fondant. I'm not gonna quit my day job or anything, but I don't hate it. (I hate it a little bit. I'm too much of a perfectionist for this shit.) Practice makes perfect, I s'pose.

Sunday I finally got to relax a bit after doing all the chores (still looking for a maid that will accept protein shakes as payment) and I fell asleep for no longer than 30 minutes in the afternoon, only to wake up pissed at the world because I hate naps. I hate 'em so much. I'm just not built to nap. I wake up angry every time, no matter how long I sleep. 

Not one workout this weekend. I ate all the things, all the time. I even went grocery shopping on Sunday. My fridge is full of fresh veggies, lean turkey and chicken breast and I said NOPE, I'm making frozen pizza because yo to the lo. We all have less than stellar food weekends, ups and downs in our healthy lifestyle and temptations to battle. I'm not makin' excuses, I'm sayin' cut yourself some slack. It happens to all of us. Plus my hair looks rad, thanks to my stylist. So whatev.


Quick, look slightly to the right.

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