Meat party

Okay okay okay. Y'all are sick of me talking about moving. I get it. But I'm still going for it because IT'S VERY inconvenient and really fucking up my mojo. I mean now I have to eat all the food in my freezer so I don't have to move it. Last night I had 3 frozen ribs from who knows how long ago when my dad smoked me a shitload of ribs - side note, he never gives me a reasonable amount of smoked meat. It's always 3 racks of ribs or 4 salmons or, most recently, an entire turkey, just for me. It wasn't even for Thanksgiving. Honestly it's pretty rad. Welcome to the meat party, population: me. (Gotta prot.)

Not to mention I have a lot of shows on my DVR to get through before the cohabitance (pretty sure that's not a real word, so don't use it in important meetings lest you look like a FOOL). But seriously, how did I get 27 episodes of Modern Family and when did Masterchef Junior come back? I'm in too deep. However, 11 episodes of Whose Line is it Anyway is the best gift anyone could have ever given me. Life goal: Wayne Brady serenading me with Ryan Stiles and Colin Mochrie to a hoe down tune. Because obviously what would happen is right afterward we would become best friends and lolz in a never ending group text. 

And do I even put up Christmas decorations? Can I just get a pine scented wallflower from Bath and Body Works and be done? Do I even have to do that?

Things I'm certainly not doing: 

Sending Christmas cards. Just, nope. Not this year. I didn't send them last year either though, so it's not completely out of the ordinary. I have designed and printed other people's cards though, so I can just piggyback on that, right? I'll just add my face to the back and call it done.

Exercising regularly. I know, I'm disappointed too, but I just don't have the time to carve out for a true daily workout until we move. I feel gross and jiggly, which is super neat and mildly concerning, but it's just a couple more weeks. 

Packing. I should get on this. It needs to happen pretty soon, probably should have started by now.

Sleeping. Also not totally weird, but it would be cool if I could fall asleep before 2am, because waking up to go be pleasant to my coworkers becomes increasingly difficult as the week goes on. So, happy Wednesday. Go forth and be nice to people even though you really want to tell them to eat a bag of dicks. That's basically adulting in a nutshell, amiright?


  1. Damn right that's Adulting in a nutshell.

    1. If I would have been told that upon graduation from high school, I could have saved a lot of effort in trying to please everyone. Life lessons for future generations.


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